November 28, 2022
Somah
My IKEA Moment…
Two decades ago, I stood in a Toronto IKEA parking lot with a cart full of brand-new household items as I began to realise a deeper voice was about to surface. I felt a weight on my chest and the welling up of tears behind my eyes, not knowing what was coming over me, especially since I had just been gifted a variety of brand new stylish household items. Visiting from Switzerland, my mom and I loaded the stuff into my car and proceeded to drive down the busy highway. Not knowing what I was feeling but bursting into tears, it hit me that I didn’t really want any of this stuff nor what it stood for. Through my tears, I uttered, “I don’t want any of this stuff!”. Encouraged by my mom’s questions, “Well, what is it you DO want??”, I heard myself sob, “I want to go back to Thailand!”
By this time, having completed a Social Work degree and having worked 5 years in women’s services as a crisis counsellor and also trying to carve out my own small natural aromatherapy cosmetic business since I had returned the year prior from my travels, I knew that if I stayed with my city life, something magical in me would shrivel up, wither and die. It felt like a vibrant aliveness in me would be smothered by a boxed in conventional life, programmed to go to a job, acquire things, chew my way through unfulfilling relationship dynamics, and all the tethers that come with that existence.
A New Life Sprouts…
There was a much richer life to be lived that would sprout from this yet fragile seed that I knew was authentically aligned with my heart and soul’s calling. I had no idea what it would look like, but I had already glimpsed another way to live, so to go back would mean a lot of internal misery. My return from almost a year of travel with a focus on yoga teacher trainings and meditation studies through Thailand, Vietnam, China, Loas, Australia and having witnessed firsthand the aftermath of the Bali bombings of 2003 and experienced the sheer gratitude of being alive, seeds had been planted in my being that could not be ignored.
At Another Crossroad…
Hard to believe that was almost 20 years ago! It seems whole lifetimes have passed since then. Standing at a crossroads and morphing into the next chapter that barely resembles the previous chapter, has occurred so many times in my life, I can barely keep count. As I approach 50 (whaaaa?!!), I’m beginning to recognise that the emerging pattern of standing at these crossroads resembles a spiral rather than a linear trajectory. Each time I’m faced with a new fork in the road, while some things clearly fall away, other elements of my previous life experiences seem to weave themselves in with new meaning and purpose.
And Coming Full Circle…
Since the start of the lock-downs, I found myself unexpectedly back on the very same island in the Southern Gulf of Thailand those many years ago. This time, forced to ‘stand still’, I slowly watched the crumbling of all my hard work and years of building up international training programs for my yoga school. A cocooning period set in where my call to ‘soul work’ required a letting go and disintegration of all I had built and in time recognising how I had been hanging on with pale knuckles, driving myself to burn out. An incubation period set in where there was merely an invitation to just keep trusting in the undercurrents that carried me forward without a sense of clear direction.
Two+ years have passed, mostly having been on a solitary path, but not without the support of loved ones in different corners of the globe, and the gift of time, filled with self-study, yogic practices, nature-connection, deep sadhana. Further connecting the dots, seeds planted years prior, and recognising that the healing magic of altered states of consciousness, whether explored through the means of yoga nidra meditation or entheogenic plants, pointing towards the common understanding at the core of many wisdom traditions.
My Journey continues…
By drawing on Eastern wisdom traditions and grounding Earth-based spirituality, my own journey continues to lead me to recognise how yoga asana, breath (pranayama), and meditation rooted in Vedic philosophy offer beautiful tools for integrating the profound experiential transformations undergone in plant medicine work. With advances made in trauma research, somatic (body-oriented) psychology, my own background in social work, vision questing, sacred plant medicine teachers, nature connection, and rooting in BEing, it has become clear anew that a weaving of these practices and tools offers an essential path forward, on a deeper current yet.
“Sometimes I go about in pity for myself, all the while, a Great Wind carries me across the sky.” ~ Ojibwe Saying
A Vision Emerges…
A vision is germinating about empowering people of all walks of life to align with the emergence of a new collective way of BEing, that honours, respects and supports the health of the entire Earth community; humans, animals, and this living planet and that this arises from the recognition that all are of a common Source.
And so now with renewed invigoration I am offering support, love and guidance to anyone who stands at a crossroads sensing there is more to life than meets the eye and who want to further connect with – and live from – their souls.
How I can Help You…
I’m excited to have reshaped my offerings and have just launched a whole new approach to my website as a reflection of these offerings.
In 1:1 Soul-Centered Coaching via Zoom (or in-person if you’re on Koh Phangan), I can help you navigate your inner landscape by shining a light on your Strength. Courage. Wisdom. And Innate Gifts. We’ll transform what’s not working for you into opportunities and cultivate new ways of BEing.
My deepest wish is to help you embody the wisdom of your Soul, its purpose & unique gifts.
Join me for a 3-month journey of weekly sessions, which includes your own customized Yoga Nidra recording, tailored audio meditations for each session, access to audio & video practices, and a workbook.
Ready to jump right in? Book in directly.
Not sure yet? Let’s connect for a free 20-minute Clarity Call.
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